"I think I love you."

Wow, what a way to go.

I looked up from fishing through my box of Sweethearts at him, "Uhh..." I darted my eyes around the park, trying to gauge a reaction. Nothing came to mind.

"Sorry." he responded, simply.

Dumbfounded, I glanced back down at the candy in my hand and tried to find something else to focus on, other than the feeling of his eyes on me. I had my legs folded on the bench and my right foot was asleep. They never put enough of the yellow hearts in the box. About a hundred feet away, a girl was arguing with her boyfriend for kissing another girl on their first and probably last Valentine's Day together. He thinks he loves me.

"Is that okay?" he asked me. He sounded small and far away and I didn't like it, it was misleading me. He was nothing but strong and within arms reach and all I wanted was to use my arms and reach for him.

"No." I answered in a shaky whisper that could almost classify as a whimper.

"No..." he repeated after me. He sounded like he might throw up, which made us quite the pair. We could revisit our candy lunches together. "Why not?" he dared.

"I have a boyfriend." I said slowly, unsure of the word 'boyfriend'. Could I call Caleb my boyfriend? The term 'boy' was too innocent for someone like him, and he was anything but friendly.

He sighed deeply and the soft voice he had been using took on an edge. "You have a boyfriend who beats you half to death on a daily basis. A boyfriend who dosen't even realize that you're spending Valentine's Day with me. Yeah, you have a boyfriend who dosen't give a damn about you, kid. And you don't seem to care much about him either when you're spending every night in my bed." he raised his eyebrows at me, "Deny it."

I glared at him.

"Deny it!" he shrugged innocently at me, "Go ahead!"

I shook my head and looked back down at my box of candy, shaking up it's contents a little. How could I deny it? It was undeniable truth.

A few moments passed us by silently while he waited for me to speak.

"My parents might be taking me to court." I told him softly.

He sighed, aggrivated with my apparent subject change, "Why?"

"I guess some people don't take too well to having their fifteen year olds run off on them to New York City." I shrugged.

"They didn't give you much of a choice though.." he was watching me watch my hands but I was afraid to meet his eyes. He had already said he loved me, I didn't need to see it.

"They don't care." I shrugged, "I tried to explain why I couldn't live in that house anymore, but I guess if they cared how their arguments were affecting their children, they wouldn't have put us in the middle of it to begin with."

He grabbed my hand, leaving me no choice but to meet his eyes.

"Why you?" he asked simply, staring into my eyes a little too intensely. I felt exposed all of a sudden. "You left with your sisters and AJ isn't of age yet either. Why do they only want to take you to court?"

I tried to shake myself lose from his stare but he didn't let up. He was a million miles away from our conversation, I knew it. Why didn't he understand what I was saying?

"I'm the easy target." I answered, "Because I was the one with the depression and because I spent that one damn week in a psychiatric hospital so they could regulate my medication. They can use that against me, claim I'm too unstable to be away from them." I glanced at the ground,"Even though I was only 'unstable' because of them and their bullshit." I mumbled as an afterthought.

He sighed and dropped my hand. "I'm really sorry, baby...but why are you telling me all this right now?"

My sigh rivaled his, "I'm fifteen." I met his eyes fully for the first time without flinching, "You're almost nineteen. That would be ammo, if they knew. Not only would I have to go back with them, but you would be in trouble, if they used that in court. So you can't love me." my voice took on an incredulous tone completely of it's own free will, "No one can know that I'm spending every night in your bed. No one can know that when I come home smiling, I was with you and not Caleb. But they will see me come home smiling.."

"I get it..."

"So I won't deny it." I pleaded with my eyes for his understanding, "But I do need him as a cover-up. I can't be with you." I shook my head, losing my nerve and looking away again. Across the park, that girl and her boyfriend were making up from their tift, using mouths and hands. I wondered what it would be like to able to kiss him in broad daylight like that, "Please just be happy with what we can have...a secret." there were tears pressing on the back of my eyes, "Try very very hard not to love me."

His sudden release of breath bordered on a laugh.

"I'm sorry." he shook his head, an uneasy smile on his face, "But I think I love you."

I just nodded sadly.

"Is that okay?"

"No." I met his eyes and felt a tear fall down my cheek, "Because I think I love you too."